The hardest part about being a dad

There are lots of hard parts about being a dad, but this has got to be the hardest…. If you agree, please say something! I’m sure it’s not just me??!

It’s not when she shits all over me
and as I clean up she decides to pee
No, that’s not the hardest part about being a dad

It’s not when she cries and keeps me up all night
makes me doubt myself and so confused inside
No, that’s not the hardest part about being a dad

It’s not how she’s taken over my life
robbed my freedom and stolen my wife
No, that’s not the hardest part about being a dad

‘Cos when I look at her and see those cheeks
her sumo wrestler arms and teeny tiny feet
I can’t help wondering how it would feel
to crunch her bones between my teeth
nothing’s as sweet and juicy as newborn meat
no salt or pepper need she’s seasoned perfectly
it’s sure not easy, my baby not to eat thee
it takes every ounce of willpower I have
and that’s the hardest part about being a dad
Yes, that’s the hardest part about being a dad

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